Thursday, February 09, 2006

Random thoughts on "love" triggered by witnessing a friend's issues

I am no love doctor and have no qualifications whatsoever for what I am about to write. The following is just my interpretation of "love" in the twisted form we, as college students, can identify with.
A guy meets a hot girl in his bio class and is fortunate enough to be paired with her for a project. The two do the necessary work, meeting outside of class. Boy is courteous, polite, and helpful. He agrees to do the legwork for the project and meet whenever is best for the girl. At the end of the project, he summons up the nerve to ask the girl out on a date. She agrees, he takes her out to dinner, pays, and is politically correct during the course of the date. The date ends at her dorm door with a hug and exchange of good nights.
Boy IMs girl when he gets back to his place to tell her he had a great time and gets no response.
The next night the guy is at a fraternity party and sees the girl. She gives him a polite greeting and moves away as soon as possible. Later that night the guy sees the girl all over a chain-smoking fraternity brother with a tattoo. He constantly makes fun of her, slaps her on the ass, and makes her go get his beer.
After half a dozen attempts to talk to the girl over the next week, bio boy gives up. He sees the girl hanging out with the fraternity guy and hears that they are dating. Later he hears that fraternity guy has cheated on bio girl, but she still wants him back. He wonders --What the hell?
Now ladies reading this, don't take offense, because this is a generalization of what I consider typical college interaction between the sexes.
As a senior, I have seen scenarios like this for almost four years. I have concluded that what women really want .....wait for a "sensitive bastard."
A sensitive bastard allows a woman to have her cake and eat it too. A woman will still have the excitement provided by a jerk or bad boy with a sensitive bastard, but she will still have the romanticism provided by a nice guy. I define a sensitive bastard as a guy who does what he wants when he wants and does not base his actions on what he thinks the girl wants him to do. He is not always politically correct. However, he differs from a jerk or asshole because he doesn't cheat or abuse women. He is romantic when the time is suitable for romance. He treats a woman with respect, but he is not afraid to make her meet him halfway (sorry for the cliche).
While I have found that girls respond to the jerk I described above, they are not happy with a character like that. They are usually miserable because of the abuse the guy doles out. Nor are they happy with the nice guy -- there is no challenge or excitement. The sensitive bastard would make a woman happy on every level.


Blogger Shannon Hollender said...

so posted on this topic - summary: Agreed.

12:20 PM  

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